Early to Rise, Makes Me Wishy-Washy, Clumsy and Determined not to Cry!


I got up at 4 am, got out the hand grinder and filled it with bourbon infused coffee beans, I started to turn the crank and wracked my knuckles on the corner of the microwave. I moved a few things and started again, who would have thought that turning a crank would be so hard? I changed my settings and tried again and started to get a good rhythm and WTF!  I lost my grip on the base  (Fibromyalgia Sucks! ) Beans costing  $17.99 a pound went sailing through the air, I could hear the pitter-patter of beautiful beans,like rain all over my small kitchen. I gave the command for my dogs to wait behind the line at the doorway, while I got the dustpan and broom. 
(Yes, I am one of those who cannot stand anyone in my kitchen when I cook and have a red line at the doorway)
I didn’t save any that hit the floor but was able to save the ones on the counter; you better believe that I wanted to get out my electric grinder, but now I was on a mission! I was going to grind my coffee by hand if it kills me!

I got enough finely ground and started the coffee pot, took my thyroid pills and set out today’s needles for insulin and took the dogs outside. I was dripping wet, breathing hard and shaking as I sat down on the chair on the back stoop. Trying to take a deep breath, I am literally over whelmed by the smell of orange blossoms and jasmine, the only good thing summer brings. I used to make a perfume called “Mid-summer Nights Dream”, (had to stop making may own perfumes and bathsalts when I moved back to California, the pollution changes the smells of the flowers) I remember thinking about the Shakespeare play, then about stars and that the meteorite shower should be about this time so I sat staring at the sky’s and waited. I thought I saw a shooting star, but with my eyesight I couldn’t trust and became doubtful, if I barely move my eyes everything blurs so in my imagination, I see shooting stars all the time, so thought, why the hell am I sitting outside in the darkness getting eaten alive by who knows what bugs? I called the dogs and we all went back inside where the kitchen smelled of bourbon and coffee.
I tested my glucose, not bad for the night of sushi I had and am still full from. So took my insulin, had my coffee and breakfast and even played a game of war of legions and lost and turned on the news.

Today is supposed to be over 112 degrees, a heat advisory has been issued until Monday for my area. I have to fast tonight for my blood work tomorrow, maybe if the wait isn’t too bad I can get mom to swing by the farmers market on our way home.
There I go dreaming about tomorrow again when today hasn’t even started yet.

Always Smile, Never let them see your fear!
Don’t give anyone power over you, only you can take charge of your life.

Posted from WordPress for Android


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